Sunday, July 28, 2013

IN ANOTHER LIFE//


Past lives, parallel universes, undiscovered galaxies and such.


One thing about me you should know is that I'm obsessed with the idea of flying. I've always wanted to have wings. I've always wanted to leap off the ground. That's the reason why i'm so obsessed with roller coasters, too, I think. I've never been afraid of heights. 

Most of my journal / diary entries involve me wishing I could fly. Sometimes, i'm not even sure if it's the actual flying i'm obsessed with, you know... maybe, it's the thought of escaping that i associate with flight. I constantly think of what I'm trying to escape from. Last night, it hit me that everything i want to run away from is in my brain. How do you run from something that lives in the back of your head?

I've been working on several blog posts for days now and I couldn't publish them cause everything I write always end up too personal to post. I read somewhere that being an artist means forever healing your own wounds and at the same time endlessly exposing them. So here goes nothing...


I often stargaze because I like the idea of parallel universes. Millions of them. They say that when you look at a star, you're looking at another version of yourself (who lives in another universe) in the eye. I like looking at stars and thinking, "Hey other Aria. Wherever the heck you may be, I hope you're happy. I really do." 

Parallel universes give me hope. I think of all the versions of me that could exist out there. It's so nice to think that there are at least a few other universes out there where things worked out for me, for us. In another universe, I could be completely happy. In another universe, I'd be the type of person who doesn't push away all the people who might possibly care for me. Maybe there's another universe out there where I'm not so terribly damaged that I actually let people inside my walls. Maybe in another universe, there's a version of you that didn't give up on me that night. Maybe there's another version of me who was brave enough to apologize and maybe she would have made you stay. Maybe in another universe, I wouldn't be one to who hurt other people before they could hurt me.

Maybe in another universe, I wouldn't prefer being alone so much that I'd let people take care of me without the fear of being walked away from.


It's so nice living in the city but it's been hard. There are no stars in this city. That makes me sad. When i go to the roof deck to stargaze, I just see smog. When I look down, I see lonely people, homeless people and paper kids with their paper happiness (yes, john green reference). The closest thing to hope are the airplanes i see and the moon. Ah, the moon. My favourite thing to do is to stay up so late that I see the moon and the sun greet each other. At 4:30am - 5:00am, you could actually see the sun rising and the mood setting at the same time.

I'm starting to think that not seeing any stars is a good thing. It has pushed me to live in this universe and to make this life count. It's pushing me to make this version of myself the best one out there and to make this life work.

I've never told anyone this, you see. I didn't mean for this blog post to be this personal but, oh well. I'll leave you with this beautiful post (click here) and this beautiful song (click here).



♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

Love always,

☾ ARIA ☽

PS: you should really read (this)

22 comments:

  1. think of happy thoughts! haha missyou ariaaaaaaaaa! <3

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  2. "Maybe in another universe, I wouldn't prefer being alone so much that I'd let people take care of me without the fear of being walked away from."

    - my favorite line from this post :)it really hits me like urgghh.

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  3. "how will we ever get out of this labyrinth?"

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  4. I thought I was the only one who thinks about these things

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  5. I love city lights view ..
    http://forever-youngstyle.blogspot.com

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  6. It can also be called as multiverse. Hehe. I can relate with you in this post. I missed you Aria. :) Have fun in your school and studies. xoxo

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  7. I swear we really think alike. I'm just really ughhh and people are like ugghh I hope we can be friends

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  8. Great shots Aria. YOU the BEST! I love reading all of these! thanks for sharing those! ^_^

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  9. The building behind you in some photos looks like beato angelico haha

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  10. OMG. I love your blog Aria! xx I hope you keep posting stuffs like this. ♥

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  11. I love you so muuuch! Very John Green

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  12. Thank you for sharing this, Aria. :)

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  13. Read John 3:16 and listen to this beautiful song :) God loves you Aria!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=juZKEuZrbKU

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  14. in another universe, i will love u still Ariaa!this is soo nice <3

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  15. You who have dangerous thoughts... beautiful thoughts, indeed... but dangerous...the shadow you have to get out is noone but yourself....
    All my love ---- yangtweet

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  17. Aria, are you one of the illhueminati people ? You remind me so much of the hues that's why i love you a lot :"><3

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  18. Awww, Aria. I feel you. This is a wonderfully written post. <33 Much love and respect to you. xx

    Gem
    gemnikkaonthego.blogspot.com

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